In Praise of Deer—A Contrarian View  by Joe Falco

 

It All Started with that darn low hedge that runs 100 feet along my driveway—every year I’d have to trim it--- took 3 or 4 hours, or else I’d have to pay the landscaper $120.

 

Then, one year, something odd—the hedge never seemed to need trimming.  I realized it must be my wonderful neighbor, Sal, who often blows my driveway free of leaves.  But, honest to a fault, Sal refused to take credit.

 

Then, one day, I saw them… the whole family of them…those Fuzzy Fauna of the Forest, munching away at the hedge as though it were the long salad bar at Ruby Tuesday.

 

And, somehow, they’d even learned to square-off the edges (more-or-less).

 

 

 

 

And then, a little later, there they were…

cutting back the brush and vines that invade my lawn every spring and summer.

 

 

I thought, “these critters aren’t half-bad”—willing to work for all they can eat, and fertilizing as the went.

 

 

 

And so began a new friendship!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some more advantages of our Dear Deer:

 

·       A plausible excuse for going to the beach instead of attempting a garden.

·       Learning by example important life lessons, including…

 

 

 

 

 

If your coat has spots, don’t worry—they’re likely to fade over time!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

…and...

 

 

 

 

 

Before you follow the herd,

 

make sure they’re not running off a cliff.

 

 

 

...or….

 

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Before you but heads with someone,

 

make sure you have the bigger antlers…

 

 

 

or at least the thicker skull!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And so, since they were here even before the Village Incorporated…

 

·       Before the 1st cocktail party …

 

·       Before the 1st Shoreham-Wading River tennis match…

 

·       Before Shoreham's Bud Siegel liberated Italy and brought pizza to America…

 

(and they will hopefully survive us and all our follies)

 

 

 

And since the Shoreham Country Club has no plans for a Venison Bake (with or without banjoes)…

 

 

  we learn to love them…

 

 

 

we'd do best to learn to love them...

 

 

 

 

 

or at least put up with them!!!

 

 

 

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